all about the day to day

we had a young hip teacher in college who we all looked upto a lot. she once told us that the longer you took to get married, the harder it was, because the more you wanted. she was the epitome of the cool single woman who would not bend down to tradition simply because she had to. she would marry when she would want to…
we werent at all surprised when she married an old german friend from college and moved away. she wasnt cut out for the typical pakistani man anyways.

late twenties have proved her words very true. you want to marry but not just anyone. you want to settle down but not JUST settle. you want it all or you want none of it. it’s a happy sad time for us because most of us are finally figuring out, after all the heartbreak and tears who we like being, who we are proud being and and now the catch is to find someone who likes that too.

as k and i start our third month as a married couple, it’s, like i said, all about figuring out the daily stuff. how we fit into each others life without disrupting the areas we were happily resolved in…and how we establish new routine while weaving in the older habits. in a society where after marriage, the woman is supposed to start-anew and the man is supposed to conti-new, it’s time we made our own news.

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8 thoughts on “all about the day to day”

  1. lol@men conti-new!!

    i have a friend here who’s a canadian revert married into a strict culture based typical desi joint family (mercies upon mercies!!)

    She always jokes that desi men couldnt have had it any better. They get to continue living with their mama with the added pleasure of having a personal cook and a servant, a companion and caretaker for the parents, babysitter for their siblings kids and …. more!

    Life couldnt get any better, could it?

  2. girl, do you realize that 1) you are making a lotta young girls feel the need for marriage and 2) that you are raising expectations as far as MashAllah near-perfect post-marriage life is concerned?

    just a thought. 🙂

  3. insiya…as far as perfection in marriage goes…i strictly believe we make our own brand. and trust yes it takes hard work, and lots an dlots of perspective. and as far as wanting to be married goes…hehe..not my fault. there aint no age restriction on my blog.

  4. Jammie,

    “she wasnt cut out for the typical pakistani man anyways.”

    You raise an interesting point. I’ve heard quite a few girls say similar things, that Pakistani guys are difficult and demanding and oedipal and all sorts of other things. And guys, too, who think Pakistani girls are vacuous, arrogant, materialistic, etc.

    These are just random observations and not provoked by any statement. But it’s interesting to see the way each gender perceives the other. I wonder where it will lead.

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