I used to be fascinated by books in which a character would mention that she had lunched with her best friend “every Saturday for the past 20 years”. I imagined a relationship flourishing just as a result of lunches and conversation and in my 18 year old life then, imagined that I, too, would form such relationships one day in my life, where I would actively take out time from the routine of my dailyness to fit in someone important even if they were not an everyday reality to me.
When we stare hard enough at the fabric of our lives, we start detecting recurring patterns and motifs- little islands of sense in the unpredictability of everyday life. We start hanging onto those constants with a vehemence, regarding them as key factors of control in an otherwise uncontrolled environment. We start working around other details in life to make space for that motif, that little puece of time out that you now regard imperative to you as you have become today.
Regular espresso breakfasts with meyum and kat over the last year of changes have beeome islands. Snatched lengths of reconnecting time. Sometimes it is silent crosswords, sometimes a non-stop conversation, sometimes venting, other times sorting, resolving and many other times just nothing at all. As I came back today, I realized that this is how, with little things, we make our individual patterns, and set precedences for years to come.