the fever of it all

Last night, k and I got out for the first time- well technically second if you count our quick hop to the forum a few days ago- But last night we went out for dinner. I got into my old jeans (yay!) and my pre-pregnancy chappals (yayer!!) and we went out and had steaks with the gang. We were out for an hour and a half or so and when we got back, my mom informed me that naddu had slept angelically throughout, being passed from one khala to the other, happily enough.

Talking to an aunt of mine later the next day, I was telling her that though I think I am truly enjoying the baby, how much fun it had been to step out with k, meet up with friends. To get a break from the tricyclical routine of feed-change-sleep. To wear something other than my tracks and comfy stretched t-shirts. To dress up. And she, being a doctor as well as a mother of two boys, told me that it’s good that I have started listening to my inner voice on what keeps me ticking happily because she had a really bad time with cabin fever and in a worst case scenario, that can translate resentment towards the baby.

In the dictionary cabin fever is defined as “boredom, restlessness, or irritability that results from a lack of environmental stimulation, as from a prolonged stay in a remote, sparsely populated region or a confined indoor area.” I suppose when you are someone who relies heavily on the world around you for most of the inspiration in your work and life, any kind of confinement can be claustrophobic. Even one that has to do with something as all important and all consuming as your baby.  And as much a huge change as a baby brings about in life in terms of  lifestyle, I think one must one some level try to retain an essence of who one is otherwise it can only get frustrating.

The last 2 weeks have been Insane. Wonderful. Perfect. Scary. New. And in all the newness, I struggle to find some snatches of the old familiar me because as much as I am looking forward to moving on and becoming this new entity, I have learnt that it’s the me that I know and am happy with that is going to pull me through in the end.


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5 thoughts on “the fever of it all”

  1. very nicely put. you know someday, you can write a book about your whole experience. it would be a best-seller.
    and btw, i think ‘naddu’ is the most adorable name ever!

  2. You’re one lucky girl! Living near family really makes it easier on new moms. The love and the support you must get is something no other person can provide.

    The last time I had dinner with Omair where it was just the two of us was 3 years ago.

    Although in all fairness we did step out for lunch on our 5th anniversary and left Iman with her Dadi.

  3. hehe thanks cheeky 🙂 thats always been a “secret” dream- to write a book-

    hina- i thank God everyday for being here right now and not somewhere else- the kind of suppoort and love and advice and learning one can get from people around you is invaluable. and i APPLAUD you for what you have managed on your own. you are an inspiration to new moms 🙂

  4. so thats the term you use for it.
    i suffered from cabin fever right after graduating.
    i’d promised my family two months of my undivided time…as in i wouldnt start working till then.
    i quite frankly went insane and turned into an emotional wreck!

    yup!you DONT need to go through that!

  5. I’m so glad you’re doing what feels naturally right for you. Eesa and I went out every night from the day we were out of the hospital and endlessly heard horror stories about women and children leaving the house prior to 40 days.

    It seems that it works better for some women to stay in the house for 40 days, but for myself, I knew I coudnt handle it and would consequently go insane. I love the way you said it: “I have learnt that it’s the me that I know and am happy with that is going to pull me through in the end.”

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