Big School, Big Boy.

Today was the first day of Big School.

The utter simplicity and ease with which my nutty little boy has morphed into a proper little boy takes my breath away. I am left reeling with the smoothness of the transition, of the polite smile and good morning, of the way he stuck his hands into his pockets (coping mechanism picked up from his dad!), and wandered into the classroom taking stock of all the new things he would get a chance to explore. I stood outside for a second, again rendered useless for a second, realizing that the  “pick me up at 12” was a dismissal and that he had better more important things to do now.

On whatsapp with Hussy later, I probed this feeling, of being less for him, and she said something that is reverberating even now, several hours later as I try to accept the truth of it.  “Isn’t it weird that so much of their life will have nothing to do with us?” And that question-statement pretty much summed up the feeling of pride commingled with the sense of loss and gain and stupor and awe and amazement and the deep deep love that I was choking on almost all of day over this sudden glimpse and insight to  the person he is turning out to be.


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6 thoughts on “Big School, Big Boy.”

  1. Awww, he looks adorable!! I know exactly how you feel, my son transformed from a helpless little baby to a boisterous, “I do alone!” shouting toddler overnight!! Well, letting go is one of the most important things a parent has to do, and well, we just got to make the most of every stage!!

  2. several hours later as I try to accept the truth of it. ”Isn’t it weird that so much of their life will have nothing to do with us?

    i have a 14 months old boy and this sentence above has been echoing in my head since i read it last night. WOW – the intelligent me is saying, its a fact but the mom is still shocked and saddened. kia karain 🙂

    1. even though I have realized it in many ways in the last 4 years, i think im going to continue doing so for the next 25 also. This is both a good thing and bad thing haina?

  3. sigh. it’s true. we raise them to let them go. we WANT them to be free-spirited, independent, creative thinking. all of which means they will their own people more and mama’s baby less. K is already less my baby and more herself…and when she’s being difficult i have to remind myself that sometimes just because she isn’t doing what *i* want doesn’t mean it’s wrong! happy schoolies, nadi!

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