write more. live more.

One thing I have really missed this year is my writing. The kids have grown so fast. The things that have happened have been huge and life altering and yet I couldn’t bring myself to find the right words so the occasions kept slipping by. I would scroll back and read so many pointless entries, celebrating and berating so many almost inconsequential events and I would wonder how I managed to muster the energy to write about those when I can’t find it in me to write about the real big stuff. But that is just it isn’t it? The real big stuff takes your breath away, paralyzing you. it takes every ounce of life juice from you and make you want to use it in the living rather than in the retrospective look back. To be fair I did write but reverting to ye old paper pen because somehow when there is resolving to do, and words are more vents, nothing does it better than good old fashioned pen on paper, pressing into the lines, forming deep impressions into the next page, taking away all the negative energy and replacing it with a calmer acceptance.

This year I want to write. Here. Where its out there because to me this is best most grown up way of dealing with what happens. By putting it into words that make sense out of the confines of one’s own mind. This year I want to be back to celebrating and berating the tiny because another thing I have learnt (or should I say relearnt?) this year is that all the real big stuff is simply yhe tiny stuff feeling ignored and piling up. So this year I plan to give the tiny stuff its due.


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4 thoughts on “write more. live more.”

  1. Selfishly admiting that I have missed the absence of your posts here. When my own words whether on paper or otherwise have failed to make sense, I have wandered in your past or present musings, finding comfort. It may seem inconsequential to you, the tiny bits, but there is something to be noticed there. Those posts end by you having figure out, everytime, with varying degrees of resolution and success, but having still figured out something to start with. May be something of the sort has happened to you, when I have found myself without the will to write, it may be because something crucial is in the midst of unfolding and I’m so swept up with it taking all my time and energy. You are a very brave person and when I read your posts, I wonder if I can learn to be like that, learn to think like that, sort through life’s puzzle like that. This is corny, but do you know the feeling of rooting for someone in a film? I feel like I have some semblance of that feeling for you. Have a joyous and prosperous new year.

    1. Thats really…nice. It always takes me by surprise that others read this stuff. Like I know its out there but once Ive written it I imagine its a black hole and the words are out there swirling away but not really reaching anywhere specific! Please do root away 😀 Roots are always welcome/needed and appreciated.

  2. The first comment here pretty much sums up everything i wanted to say.

    So glad you are back!
    your loyal readers are still lurking around : )

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